The Midnight Library  by Matt Haig

We met at 644 Peterson Street on 2/22/2022 – a cold day in Fort Collins. Present were Libby Edwards, Mary Lib Sovick, Joan Ritchie, Margie Karuzas, Annie Sjoberg, Paige Noon, and Saran Twombly. 

Our discussion of The Midnight Library was a lively one, largely because our reactions to the book varied considerably. Here is an incomplete summary:

Some of us were attracted to the book because it tackles what we thought a universal struggle to find one’s role in life amidst regrets for opportunities not seized, doors closed, failures, and disappointment at realizing that we couldn’t do anything we wanted (Mrs. Elm’s advice to Nora). Others found this premise either trivial or unconvincing. Did Nora not want something in life that would guide her actions? Why did it take her so long to get her act together?

Some of us found Nora believable while others did not – again, did she want nothing? What took her so long? For others of us, her despair was a bit more tangible.

This difference caused us to reflect on our own experiences 

. We have reached a stage in our lives when we are relatively or entirely content with what we have and who we are. How did we get here? How long did it take us? What ‘alternate lives’ did we try out en route? Even for those of us who were not fond of the book (Annie, Margie), there were points in their lives that took them on new paths that were more satisfying. Annie is no longer pushing levers in ‘business school’ for example. Would she have pursued occupational therapy and education on her own? Mary Lib found her true interests and skills when she failed to get a job she really wanted. Libby talked about doing a different job every year that she lived in Europe, and none of these was what she trained or planned to do. Paige’s aspirations were forestalled by having a family. Our paths have all wandered.

The question then arose of whether the appeal of this book changes with one’s age? Would someone in his or her 30s have a different (more extreme, more damaging?) impression of the book than someone in her 40s or 50s or beyond? Is the book ‘safe’ for everyone to read?

Mentioned above is that some of us found Nora’s successive lives tedious or confusing. Why did she have to revisit so many? And why did she never really know what was happening when she reappeared in a life that she formerly lived? Not recognizing the scar from a Cesarean birth, what songs would she perform, what happened in Chicago last year,  where her brother was caused anxiety – how would she resolve this? How would she rescue herself? We all agreed that there was no resolution in any of the stories. Nora left abruptly when unpleasant parts of her ‘new’ life emerged.

Her evolution then, as we could follow it, was incremental. Each life brought a lesson. Each brought up a desire to explore another life. We talked quite a bit about whether this incremental education is what happened to each of us, or whether it is an exaggeration to tell a story. The exception was the final story – her life with Ash and Molly. We could figure out why she left to return to her real life; but as with all other stories, the progression and lessons and reasons were not well articulated or tied together.

And why is this book on the New York Times’ Best Seller List week after week? This surprised many of us. We didn’t find the writing all that terrific, but books on this list are best sellers, after all, and not the best written books. Throughout the book, though, were wise life lessons, sometimes in the name of philosophers (Camus, Thoreau, Sartre), sometimes from physics (parallel universes) and sometimes in the author’s own words. Paige collected over 2 pages of these ‘lessons’ – these are the real lessons of the book / life transmitted through Nora’s struggles.

Finally, each of us was interested in some stories (Hugo on Svalbard) more than others (the failed TED talk). Some found Hugo hilarious; others were stuck with is parallel universes. We found Haig’s choice of a library to be interesting; we often read books to experience different lives. This library existed solely for Nora, and she had the opportunity to experience her own different lives – more than she could handle. She survived; life comes after despair.

FORTY AUTUMNS by Nina Willner

Forty Autumns is a family memoir tying together the members that lived in the east, how they managed in a changed communist totalitarian environment for forty years, with a daughter in the west.  Willner uses this family history as a lens to retell the story of the Cold War and the communist takeover in east Germany.  Many in the group felt it was a relevant read for the story of our lives but also a jumping off point for what is going on in the world today.  

The group was held at Annie's home even though the book was chosen by Libby.  Libby's house is being dismantled by two 18 month old twin toddlers, so Annie graciously offered her home.  It was a lovely calm afternoon, the beginnings of a snowstorm, with Joanie, Annie, Paige, Saran, Lucie, and Libby in attendance, and Marylib on FaceTime which worked out well, as she had some good things to say.  

Libby was mostly interested in how the members of the family coped in those times.  Oma used her garden to feed the family and keep her occupied in loving the earth.  Opa had the worst time conforming first to Nazism and then abruptly changing to the communist doctrine as a teacher.  And eventually he could not hold it inside and for his talking out, he and Oma were sent to a smaller village, and eventually he was sent away to an asylum.  The youngest Heidi held on to her five year old memory of meeting Hanna in Heidelberg to use as a light through the communist regime. Heidi and her husband Reinhard made their tiny plot of land their "freedom" with building the Paradise Bungalow.  And they never joined the communist party.

Joan mentioned that fear is a major way suppression can exist.  Opa later in life just lost his fear and was thus a threat to the regime.  Paige also mentioned that these type of regimes certainly tap into fear to do what they want with the people.  Annie felt that the people in East Germany lost trust in neighbors and even in family members, and to live that way, all must be paranoid.  

Marylib and Paige and Libby all had some experience being behind the Iron Curtain, Libby in the 60's and Paige in the 70's, and Marylib had family members that were effected by the Iron Curtain, but who were in so much disbelief when the "wall" fell and everyone was free to leave or travel!  Libby brought some old album pictures of East Berlin, including a notebook from a crumbling building that might have once been a school.

Saran marveled that without this book how would we have known what the people went through in East Germany, and to some in the eastern system it was a fine way of life.  Everything was taken care of, there were some opportunities.  And if you were a world class athlete such a Cordula, the world was easy.  All of the athletes could not believe it when the wall fell, and some had already defected in overseas competitions.

At the end we did talk roaming all over the world problems, which made us leave on a slightly depressing note. But I look back on Oma's quote:  "We have survived East Germany with our dignity intact.  This life has not always been easy, but it has not made us bend.  It has actually made us stronger.  And we are strong because our souls are free".  I am leaving now on a positive note!